fattyprejudice

After my mother passed away, I began to look at my own life and the way I live it.  Upon reflection I began to realize that I had allowed people who were most important to me to slip out of my life.  I had two very good friends  (who were sisters) whom I had known since high school that I had lost track of since my remarriage 7 years ago.  I began a campaign to get them back into my life.

I searched the internet for months with no luck, and finally, begrudgingly, I  paid for a people search (http://peoplesearch.com ) service and was thrilled when it came up with an address for “Sherrill”* in a small town near where I had last known her to be.  I called the telephone number that came with the search and, unhappily for me, it had been disconnected!  So, I tried an old email address I had for her (again) and got no response. I should add that I had tried this email several times in the past few years only to get no response, and in my own ignorant insecurity, ASSumed that she just didn’t want to re-connect.  So, I pretty much gave up on her at that point.

One day, I was browsing a popular website for high school alumni to reconnect, (http://classmates.com ), and although I could find no information on either of my missing friends, I did find an old friend of theirs, a friend who was not very fond of me, nor I of her, in high school. We had our “issues” let’s say.  For some unknown reason, I decided to browse her photos and lo and behold there were several pictures of her and “Sherrill” at her house in Texas, taken just a few months earlier!  I was so excited I shot her a quick comment to the photo and gave her my contact information. I wasn’t sure she would even get the message since I only commented on the photo. I don’t have a paid membership to the site and couldn’t send an email from it.  She got the message because the next day she called me!! I was shocked, I really didn’t expect to hear from her.  When I answered the phone, she spoke to me as if I was a long lost friend and she was actually happy to talk to me!  I assumed she hated me and I guess at some point she did.  I was the target of many bullies back in high school, and, unfortunately she was one of them.  Well this telephone conversation, lasted for the better part of an hour and consisted of her apologizing for the way she treated me in school, and of me forgiving her and reassuring her that I had gotten past it (which I have, for the most part).  We have now become very good email buddies along with a phone call here and there, isn’t it funny how time changes things?

She gave me the contact information for “Sherrill”.   I called her immediately after I hung up from Sue, and we had a very long conversation catching up on the lost years.  She had moved to Texas due to her husband’s job and now runs a business from her home and is happier than she has ever been.  She gave me her sister, “Liz’s”* info and I have since called her and have been to her house for a dinner party.  We all email each other are very happy to be back in each other’s lives.  The best part about this is I started out searching for 2 old friends and ended up with 3!

My mother’s death has really made me think of so much in the way I live my life. One of the biggies  was that she died a very lonely, depressed woman (see my blog “My Mother’s Funeral”)  and I decided that I do NOT want to have my life come to an end with no one to remember me, and now, I know that  at least 3 more people will remember me.

*I have changed the names for privacy purposes

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