fattyprejudice

Yesterday while eating dinner, my husband asked me what we would be having for New Year’s Eve dinner.  I looked at him and asked him ” What? We haven’t even eaten this dinner and you want to know what we’re having tomorrow??”  Well he got a hurt and disappointed look on his face and I realized that he was only wondering because  he is from Germany and in German tradition, there is a special dinner on New Year’s Eve just like we have here on Thanksgiving.  I  did some research and would like to tell you about the German tradition of “Silvester” which is what the Germans call New Year’s.

Germans celebrate the new year, or Silvester as they call it, like most people around the world. Most of the people have parties and fireworks, but many people choose to spend the evening quietly at home watching “Dinner for One ” on TV.

The name comes from The Saint Sylvester “Der Heilige Silvester” who served as Pope from 314 up until his death on December 31, 335. He cured the Roman Emperor Constantine I of leprosy after converting him to Christianity. You can read more about the History of the name “Silvester” and why Germany calls New Years Eve by this name at the at this link: learn even more!

It seems that New Year’s was not always celebrated on January 1st in Europe, it used to be celebrated in March according to the old Roman calendar.  You can read about this at the same Link above.

On that note, I wish you a VERY happy and prosperous New Year full of happiness and good things.  Blessings to you all!

As I grow older, I find myself thinking of how I had pictured  my life would be.  I saw myself living in a nice home with big yard, a home that my children and grandchildren would look forward to visiting.  I thought that I would be the best grandma in the world,  full of patience and energy so that I could keep up with my active 3 year old granddaughter.  I thought I would be healthy, traveling in a motor home, living the good life that I had worked so hard for and deserved.
As I grow older I think of all the things I could have done differently like finishing college and working part time at something I love  and having  retirement money put away for my future.

As I grow older, I see the bleak reality of how things really are.  I live in an apartment with too little space where college students play their music too loud and the police come to break up a  party that just won’t end!  I have diabetes & Rheumatoid Arthritis, am overweight and have high blood pressure and I have no energy.  I have no job for reasons that I believe are stated above.  My husband has been furloughed from his job at the railroad for almost a year now, his unemployment benefit is ending in February and we are barely getting by.  if it wasn’t for his family helping us, I truly believe we would be homeless.

This is not what I had visualized my life would be like, As I grew older.  The upside is that we have our beautiful, if not overly active granddaughter, my 2 kids who love me and lets not forget the thing that all older people seem to have, our cats.  AND, I’m breathing, and I AM growing older.  :)  Have a great day!

 Just yesterday, I blogged about our health insurance ending next month. Figures, since I woke up today and realized that my thyroid is out of control again!  I was diagnosed with Hyperthyroidism about 2 years ago and since I got on Tapazole for it, it has been pretty much under control.  I was even taken off the meds because thyroid level was beginning to get a little low.  Now I see that it is going to be a non stop yo yo effect!

How can I tell that my thyroid is out of control again?  Well , my first clue is my heartbeat, I can actually see it!  It is so fast and hard, just pounding!  Second is that anxiety feeling and restlessness, unable to sleep, and the big one… a little unexplained weight loss. Not that the weight loss is a bad thing but according to my doctor, not a good way to lose weight.  Right before I was diagnosed, I lost 30 pounds.  I was thrilled but I thought it was from the flu I had a few months earlier.  After I found out what really caused it (routine blood tests showed a high level of thyroid stimulating hormone, or TSH ) I was sent for a thyroid scan and when the results came back as a great big TOO HIGH!!  My doctor called me to come in and she gave me a choice of having my thyroid dissolved with a combination of drugs and radiation or to go on the pills (Tapazole).  I chose the pills because dissolving it just seemed too radical to me and the thought of having low thyorid (aka “Hypothyroidism” ) and getting fatter than ever did not please me at all!

So I guess I’m off for blood tests tomorrow and then to the doctor to decide on the best course of treatment, and since I have about 1 month left of health insurance, I need to get this thing under control!  Life certainly isn’t easy for a fat 50 something woman like me.  It seems that the medical conditions keep adding up and I just keep getting less healthy every day.  It’s time for me to do something radical, I am considering Gastric Bypass surgery to lose weight, but that, my friends is for another blog.

Now that Christmas is over, it’s time  for a reality check.  I woke up this morning in pain. My hips hurt along with my left hand. My right hand isn’t so bad because my wrist is fused and has been locked up for more than a year already, thank God for small blessings.  Oh I don’t think I mentioned that I have Rheumatoid Arthritis .  I live with pain every day, but it’s not so bad because I’ve gotten used to it.  It’s just that some days Continue Reading »

I got an award from Purple Cashmere !!

It’s the Spread The Love Award. Now I’m spreading the love to the following randomly selected bloggers : Continue Reading »

Here it is, the day after Christmas and man do I have a mess on my hands!  My kids and my granddaughter were here yesterday and the dishes are in the sink to prove it!  We really had fun watching my granddaughter opening all of her gifts from us and Santa (This year, “Santa” was courtesy of the employees of the railroad my husband works for-see my previous post regarding this), but I couldn’t help but notice how greedy she Continue Reading »

The scenerio: You get called at the last minute to attend a dinner for Christmas but you have no money and even if you did, you have no time to go out and buy a gift.  So, you go to the dinner, feeling a bit embarrassed and worried about what you will do when the time for gift giving comes.  You fiddle with your fingers, look in your purse for a tissue and you find… a gift card that someone had given you for your birthday a few weeks earlier Continue Reading »

With Christmas upon us, I find myself becoming more and more depressed about my own situation.  As I have stated in previous postings, I am unemployed and having a very hard time finding a job.  My husband is also not working, it’s not that he doesn’t have a job, because he does, he Continue Reading »

Well, I was supposed to have a job interview today but it was cancelled.  That’s ok though, I wasn’t feeling up to the task of being rejected anyway.   I have become so discouraged in this last year trying to find a job, I’m pretty much done with it (IF ONLY!).

Before an interview, I find myself looking into a mirror and thinking “Would I hire me?”  “Will they Continue Reading »

In my previous post “Mystery Shopper? “, I described a scam mystery shopper that I inadvertently got involved in. Well the very next day I received yet another check supposedly to replace the previously received check that I had emailed them about that was drawn on an account that had reported fraudulent activity!!!  I can’t believe the nerve of them sending me ANOTHER  check after I told them not to contact me again!!! Wow!  So I called the bank of this new check and asked to speak to the Loss Prevention department.  I got a guy who really knew what he was talking about Continue Reading »